I normally decide I’m going to exercise more, eat less chocolate, spend less money… but I don’t do anything practical to achieve them, and 2025 was definitely not the year I managed! However, I have a sneaky suspicion that 2026 is going to be a very different year for me.
I think 2025 was a year I learned a lot about myself. Not only will I never give up chocolate, but my priorities have changed and I see myself in a different way. I started last year with a whole heap of goals – I had just started a new job, and wanted to show how much I deserved my promotion and to make a different to those around me. I had owned Frankie for 10 months and was starting to think of all the goals I wanted to achieve with him – jump bigger, better dressage scores, hack solo, event, go to camp, qualify for everything. I felt the world was my oyster and that moving onwards and upwards at pace was the way to go.
By the middle of the year, I had begun to realise that I may have been a bit ambitious (shock horror!). My confidence at work wasn’t gone, but I’d realised that doing the right thing and speaking up meant that you aren’t always the most popular person in the room.
By trying to keep pushing forwards with Frankie, I had forgotten the importance of consolidation – and although we could jump a single jump at a higher height, I hadn’t worked on “me” as much as I should have. In hindsight, I used a lot of physical and mental effort in the wrong way and I was repeating a lifetime trait – worrying and fixating on things I couldn’t control, rather than the things I could. It made me think again about a lot – although anyone who knows me knows that it takes me quite some time to mull things over before it makes sense in my head.
What I realised is that in all aspects of my life, I needed to consolidate. So Frank and I took what initially felt like a step back… we worked on our flat work, we relied on help from my friend at our yard and EquiTeam’s Coach Liz to help me to understand better ‘how’ to jump. I started to see personal and work relationships for what they really were – which ones mattered and which ones weren’t what I thought they were. Whether with our horses or the people around us, relationships need to be a two way thing, and shouldn’t make us feel bad. One of the phrases I’ve come to understand is the importance of clearly asking a question and hearing the answer – and sometimes considering whether the question isn’t clear in the first place. This isn’t just true with horses by the way!
Making plans
I had a few months off after surgery, and am now getting ready to go back to my job – one that I am indeed very proud of. I am returning to work with a better plan of what my work/life balance is going to be, and also a commitment to be true to myself in every part of my work interactions. I plan to listen more, consolidate what I’ve learned and focus my time on what truly matters and not the noise that creeps into the background.
In all parts of my life I want to spend my time, money, self and commitment on the right things. I want to trust myself more – to listen to my gut, to consolidate before I move on, and to have relationships within my family, friends and horse which are mutually beneficial. I don’t want to be that annoying person who is in your face all the time, but I also don’t want to be an absent friend. I want to be genuinely and unapologetically me in every part of my life – with the capacity to grow and change and learn and listen. I want to continue to consolidate and build on 2025 and take a new and stronger confidence and commitment into 2026.
So my plan for 2026 is to start small, with goals that are achievable. I’ve already started populating my EquiTeam journal and weekly planner and if you haven’t ordered them yet now is your reminder! I’ll work on practicing what I am learning, building up slowly and steadily, giving myself time to become confident and granting myself permission to get it wrong without the world falling apart.
I’ll surround myself with people who I care about and who care about me. I’ll ask for help when I need it and always be happy to help those around me. I’ll remain true to myself – someone who cares, who can twitter like a budgie, who loves a project and who is committed to helping EquiTeam take over the world. I know there will be challenges, I know it won’t all go well and I already have an inkling of some of the things that might be hard to manage. But I think I’m going into this year a stronger person than I have ever been.
So, when I need to, I’ll switch off my phone or laptop, I’ll be lazy before I burn out, I’ll hug Frankie, I’ll learn from what goes wrong and I’ll celebrate my successes with you all… and my wish to all you other EquiTeamers is that you do the same.
Gill x
