EquiTeam member Charlotte Nevison shares why grabbing a sugary drink, taking more rescue remedy whilst having a bit of a word with herself was the answer.
The pattern for me is always the same when it comes to a new event. Something catches my eye (like a new competition – Style this time and a qualifier for Scone Palace), I think what a great idea that would be to enter. I enter, I feel super excited on the lead up to it, then the day before I regret my life decisions and wonder what I was thinking lol!!
I have always suffered performance anxiety but I also love having a decent goal and working hard to improve so I’ve always just persevered through it.
On this occasion it was our first attendance at an Agricultural Show (Perth Show) to compete in our first Style Jumping Class. I had decided it would be good for my youngster Pixie (age 7) to have a jump on grass before her next event at Forgendenny in a week’s time.
I had done Style jumping many moons ago and just remembered it was about being in balance, keeping a rhythm and looking in harmony. Since we were entering that I also popped her in the unaffiliated 90cm show jumping class which is the level she is eventing.
I always use a note list on my phone for remembering competition kit (it’s amazing how close I’ve come to missing a girth, stirrups or even a bridle once) and I enjoyed having all morning to plait and do stud holes in a nice relaxed way listening to my audiobook.
My friend Claire and her 6 year old daughter chummed me to the event which I am always super grateful for, they are both kind and supportive and really help me not to get stuck in my head too much at any point in the day. We arrived in plenty of time and got a great parking spot by the warm up arena, near the exit so it was a good start.
Learning from mistakes
The first rookie error I made on the day was to learn the SJ course (for 80) which then changed every class eek lol! We warmed up ok then I hopped off to course walk. It was a huge arena and I already felt quite stressed by the noise and all the spectators so I could tell I was taking longer than normal to remember the course!
I was third to go which was quite tight on time and as I walked round in the warm up I was told fence 3 was causing issues (I’m not sure how useful this was to know to be honest).
My first confidence wobble came when at the entry gate where there was a bit of snash regarding the running order which unsettled me a bit, but Claire was there to soothe and settle.
It's show time!
Then it was show time – I’d done as much reading about the rules as I could so I felt prepared, and this combined with the EquiTeam Connected chat and checking due process on the gate helped. All felt fine until fence 3 when Pixie locked on something else and ground to a stop from a stride or so away?! I was a bit surprised and wobbled as whilst I’m used to rolling poles, I’m not used to refusals in the SJ ring. So, I pulled myself together circled back, kicked on and she popped it fine then we were back in our happy jumping groove.
As I came out of the arena I just had a barrage of unhelpful negative thoughts (chimp chat* on overdrive) that I couldn’t just dismiss. I felt something was amiss, worried in case we weren’t up for the next round, imagined the worst (a fall or tripping over a flying rolled pole) and generally made myself feel rotten.
Claire was brilliant, she quietly looked after Pix as I took a couple of quiet moments to myself in the lorry, grabbing a sugary drink and more rescue remedies whilst I had a bit of a word with myself. Six year old Charlotte is also fabulous distraction as you can’t be in your own head too much with a child warbling away! I knew we hadn’t come this far to only do one class and I knew Pix was feeling fabulous, she just needed a bit more of a hand hold today in this bigger atmosphere.
I.e. I needed to mobilise my fight response (and kick on!) instead of allowing my stress freeze response to take over (and sit too quietly) which I know I am prone to do if feeling overwhelmed.
When I’m like this, I try to slow it down a bit, do my breathing exercises and just do the next baby step which was to course walk the next class (telling myself I don’t need to do all of it unless I am ready for it).
Since I am not used to courses changing between classes and I know my memory gets worse when I’m stressed, I took my time, had a nice chat with a rider I knew and a spectator I recognised (both made me feel lots better) and I kept running through the course in my head checking I had it nailed.
Having Claire there to look after Pix so I don’t inflict my nerves on her makes a huge difference too, she is also just so non-judgmental and supportive just in a powerful low key way. She is also no nonsense, so if I say I think I’ll just leave the next class she will quietly have none of it!
Having Claire there to look after Pix so I don’t inflict my nerves on her makes a huge difference too, she is also just so non-judgmental and supportive just in a powerful low key way. She is also no nonsense, so if I say I think I’ll just leave the next class she will quietly have none of it!
I didn’t feel the same pressure for this one as it wasn’t a qualifier but (as I told myself) this was just a jump practise on grass. I had more time to warm up and even watched two rounds which was a bonus !
I made sure I was early for this one, then in the ring I pushed on a bit more to compensate for the temptation to sitting a bit still! It felt a bit scrappier and we had a few wrong canter leads on the way round but whilst we tapped one we managed a rare clear so I was absolutely thrilled with Pixie Pie and super grateful that I had worked through my temptation to run!
We ended on a horsey high including a 2nd place and our first prize money which went straight towards Pixies treats jar and bubbles for us!
Charlotte x
*The Chimp Paradox by Prof Steve Peters
