For the most part riding your horse should be about having fun, forming a bond with your horse and sharing a journey.
Some people get additional enjoyment from progression and educating themselves and their horses, some get pleasure from hacking with no desire to be a competitive rider, while others from simply being with their horse. There is no right or wrong as long as your horse makes you smile.
I’m not suggesting that you should go around with a smile plastered on your face like the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland – but if your horse rarely makes you grin is it time to ask why?
I needed to find the fun again…
On a podcast that we have just recorded, ‘The Eventing Dentist’ Jodie Neill, spoke about how she has never been afraid to step down a level in eventing when she needed a confidence boost – her reasoning – ‘I needed to find the fun again and remember why I event.’
I absolutely love this mentality. At the heart of her success is just a horse-mad girl who clearly loves her horse and wants to enjoy the journey. With little expectation on herself, by her own admission, she ended up enjoying it more and therefore achieving more than she dared imagine.
You should be enjoying this
On numerous occasions over the years I have stood in the middle of the arena, looking at people on camps and wondered why they are putting themselves through it!
I’m not talking about the people who feel nervous – we all get nervous out of our comfort zone, but generally once we are on and breathing we start to enjoy it – even if this is after we have finished!
I’m thinking about the people who are physically terrified and crippled with nerves. On more than one occasion I have reminded people of a basic principle, ‘This is your hobby, this is your downtime from the craziness of life. You should be enjoying this.’
Their courage and determination is exceptionally admirable, and I get immense pleasure from being able to help people to find the confidence to enjoy their sport – but if you never get past the point of being terrified every time you ride, I do start to ask why.
Is it habit, is it an expectation, or desire; or a deep-seated emotional reason? Maybe they have something to prove to themselves?
Everyone has a different reason for riding, we all work in different ways and want different things, but the one thing that truly unites us is our love and passion for horses, and with that should come the smile on your face!
I love nothing more than a rider praising, or loving their horse, with a big smile on their face, knowing that their horse is smiling too.
Life is too short
I believe that we are very privileged to have horses and that they enrich my life, in every way possible. They are in my blood and I love both horses and the sport – but I also believe that you don’t ‘have’ to push yourself to a place that terrifies you.
If you enjoy hacking but hate competitions, or love jumping, but XC gives you the fear – then it is OK to say no! Your horse has no expectations and won’t be ‘ruined’ if you say no. He isn’t sitting in bed at night studying last year’s track from Badminton Horse Trials in the hope that one day you might also think it’s a good idea.
Life is far too short to be conforming to expectations. Instead, take a step back, take the pressure off and remember why you do what you do with your horse. If you need to take a step back on your journey to consolidate, then be brave enough to admit it.
If you learn to enjoy the moment and focus on the things you love, then your smile will be huge.
Liz x
Photo credit: Dave Cameron Photography
